Have you ever come to class and realized you either forgot to do an assignment, or forgot to bring it with you? After you realized this, did you think to yourself: My professor didn't tell us this was due? Have you ever been expected to do something at home, and you didn't do it? Then your parents come home and ask why it's not done, and you quickly respond with, "You didn't tell me to." Have you ever questioned whether you are your own responsibility?
Had you asked me whether or not we are responsible for ourselves, and our actions prior to very recently, I would have without hesitation said, "Yes!" What I wouldn't have been able to do was tell you why I feel the way I do. Then, within last two weeks or so, I received an E-mail from my psychology professor that made me stop and dig a bit deeper into the origins of my thoughts and feelings. In this E-mail she told me that she was going to a conference on nonviolent communication. She stated that she was having "interesting thoughts already."
The speaker had told everyone at the conference that they should have more empathy for their students. The presenter also told them that they could accomplish the very same thing, which is getting the students to do more, and pay greater attention by using more empathy. In the E-mail my professor said she felt like giving some of her students anything but empathy. It was very apparent she really felt like some of her students have been empathized with for far too long. I'm pretty sure she could have gone on for a very, very long time about this subject.
I agree wholeheartedly. Society as a whole has been empathized with for far too long in my opinion. The deeper I dig, the more I have begun to realize that the origins of my thoughts and feelings stem, at least in part, from watching society. I can't count the number of times over my school years, including college that I have watched students beg for empathy. "You have to understand, I have two kids to take care, a job to work so that I can keep food on the table, and school." "Please, you've got to understand that I'm doing the best I can."
As far as I'm aware, college is not part of our basic educational requirement. If that's the case, then why are some of these people in college? I understand that today's world is very, very career oriented. I am also very well aware that it is extremely difficult to get what most would consider a "decent" job. The greater share of the current population has at least one child. Needing to get a good job and support a family are two good reasons why some people may be doing so much multitasking today.
Once again, however, I agree with something my psychology professor recently said. When she made this comment, we were sitting in class, and she was talking about how the students of her psychology adjustment class had to turn in a log of how much TV they were watching a day. When she calculated the amount of TV watched in a five day week, it was approximately 25 hours. Also, these students were spending approximately two to three hours a day on the internet, and this internet time was not school related. When she was finished telling us this, she made a very profound statement. It was this statement that I agree with: "School is a full time job!"
There were many times throughout this semester, even though it has ended now that I spent Friday nights doing homework. With bigger projects, I would spend all night Friday, most of the day Saturday, and all day Sunday working on them. Sometimes I would be lucky if I finished with the bigger projects by ten o'clock Sunday night. Now, some individuals who know me might respond to these facts by saying something to the affect of: Yes, but don't you think that has something to do with the fact that you're disabled? Maybe it has some impact since my motor skills are somewhat delayed and typing can sometimes be a very slow process. However, I don't think it has a great deal to do with it.
I am very passionate about school. I always have been! I feel like the work for school should be treated like any other work for any other job. Do it to the best of your ability, or don't do it at all! If` some individuals can't, or don't want to make the full time commitment to school, then I don't think they should make a half hearted attempt just because it's what they think is right.
Now don't get me wrong, I truly feel like parenthood should be a full time job as well. That's exactly my point: It is very difficult to maintain two full time jobs, and devote the time and attention to each of them that they deserve. However, I have a hard time with argument for empathy of "I have two kids, a job, and am trying to go to school." First of all, by now the people who have kids, especially young ones know much time and responsibility they require. If they are aware of this, then why would they take on another full time job that wasn't required? Is it because they don't look at school as a full time job? Has someone around them told them that if they didn't go to college they would be disappointed in them? Those of us who do consider school a full time job may never understand why others would take on more responsibility, especially responsibility that isn't required of them when they already have so much.
I feel like they are inhibiting our ability, those of us who do consider school a full time job to learn. When they, the students who either don't want to be there because they feel it's a waste of their time, or because they have tried to take on three full time jobs come to class with incomplete assignments, and as a result my professor sees no reason to go over the answers because not enough people have done it, I feel like we're the ones who suffer. They probably aren't even thinking about the fact that their assignment isn't done. Chances are, if they really don't want to be there, or their minds are with one of their other jobs, they probably don't care.
In the beginning of this paper, I mentioned that I wholeheartedly believed that we were responsible for ourselves, and our actions. I also mentioned that part of the reason I was writing this paper was because I wanted to uncover the reason for my very passionate thoughts and feelings. Although I was sure there was a deeper reason when I started writing, I wasn't sure what it was. I can confidently tell you now that I know why I feel the way I do. It's because the more I write, the more I see that it's unfair to those of us who do take responsibility for ourselves to have to take responsibility for them as well.
Now I understand that some might say something to the affect of you are only responsible for yourself. To a great extent I agree, but don't you think we become at least somewhat responsible for them over time? I do. A great example of this is when a classmate leans over toward you and says, "Hey, what did she just say?" Being the good hearted individual that you are, you politely repeat what has just been said. You then turn your attention back to the lecture. Moments later, the same classmate turns to you once again and repeats the same question. If you continue to politely respond to this question, I feel like they have become your responsibility, if only simply because you don't want to hear the question anymore. Why should we be expected to take on that responsibility when our real passion is learning?
Yes, we are our own responsibility. Even though we may not make the most responsible decisions sometimes, we are adults. There are situations where empathy is required. However, I don't feel that college isn't one of them. As far as I'm aware, college is not part of our basic educational requirement. Society as a whole has been empathized with for far too long. It's time we stop begging for empathy, and start looking at what's already going on in our lives, and decide whether or not we can, or want to take on more responsibility that isn't required.