I'm reflective. Today is the anniversary of the restraining order, and also further back, of my first kiss ever. (1997, during a particularly boring computerized game of Trivial Pursuit) If that's not the proof that the universe has a sense of humor, I'm not sure what is.
But I'm also fighting feeling sorry for myself because of my situation and the fact that I'm alone on a day I really wanted to share with someone, anyone, who cares.
I did get to spend parts of it with people. My local friend Joe came by as a surprise in the morning, and I got to see most of Moulin Rouge with Max in the evening, but neither, although they were both great, filled the exact need I feel somehow.
Sigh. I'm really not sure what's wrong with me or if I can climb out of this tunnel I seem to be in. I guess we'll see.