Bev's Babbling Blog

A Mixed Bag of Thoughts....

I just thought I would write some before I go to bed so that way maybe all these thoughts won't be in my head when I try to get some sleep. 

First off, I worked very hard today trying everything I could possibly do to fix my camera.  Now I can't even get the software to download on the computer.  It is very frustrating when you feel like you don't know what you are doing.  I appreciate all the help Pimpernel put into trying to help me get it fixed, when he wasn't even here.  He was having to tell me on messenger step by step things to try.  I know that has to be hard to do especially when you are trying to talk to somebody like me that doesn't understand things very well sometimes.  I really do appreciate his help though. 

I ended up emailing Kodak so hopefully they will have some answers.  If I don't hear from them by Wednesday I will have to call them.  I hate doing that because I feel like they think I am so stupid. 

Now to the next thing that has been on my mind.  Friendships are one of the most important things to me.  It always has been.  Like I said in my story I wrote awhile back, I have always dreamed of having a best friend that I can be myself around and always depend on.  I have a few people that I talk to online that I feel that way about.  Not real sure if the feeling is mutual, but that is how I feel anyway.  My thing it right for me to go around feeling like I have to watch everything I say to them for fear of making them mad and not talk to me for days?  Upsetting my friends seems to be one of my best qualities even when I don't even try.  I just start feeling like if I have to watch everything I say and always worry because they get upset with me easily, then maybe they are not a true friend after all. 

I am not saying I should be ugly to them or do things I know will make them mad.  That isn't quite what I mean.  I just know sometimes I feel like I can't say anything because it might upset them.  They say whatever they want to me, whether I have voiced how it bothered me or not. 

I guess what I am saying is, I feel like best friends or real good friends should be able to joke around or say what is on their mind or their opinion about something (especially when asked what your opinion is) without feeling like they have pissed somebody off. 

I try to always be honest with people, that is just part of who I am.  But lately I feel like I have been trying to change who I am just to please other people.  Am I the only one that doesn't think that is a good way to live? 

Well, enough babbling for tonight. 

Take Care and God Bless,


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